You brag about all the lobster you eat to everyone you meet outside of Maine. When the reality is, you probably eat it just as rarely as they do.
You love the ocean.
You either own multiple pairs of boat shoes…or you automatically assume people who own multiple pairs of boat shoes are from Falmouth or Yarmouth and have a membership to a Yacht Club.
Portland, Maine is an enormous city.
You love sledding.
You have picked apples at Thompson’s Apple Orchard. And you have eaten their fresh-baked homemade donuts.
Stephen King and Sal from Blueberries for Sal are huge celebrities.
Abercrombie & Fitch was cool in middle school.
At one point or another you have passed the time by wandering around L.L.Bean in Freeport simply because they are open 24/7.
Playing beer pong in a barn was a normal Friday night.
You applied to Bowdoin, Bates, and Colby.
You attended Bowdoin, Bates, or Colby…..either that or you got denied and attended USM or UMaine.
You survived the Ice Storm of ’98.
You love the creepy little old woman on the Marden’s commercials.
Where the hell is Marden’s?
Island parties were the highlight of your summers.
You own a sweatshirt from a gas station. Two of my favorites include “Gut Deer?” and “Black Fly Crossing” – both of which were purchased by my family many years ago on our way North to snowshoe for my mother’s birthday.
You put dresses in your drawers because all of your hangers are taken up by Goodwill flannels.
You have a sticker on your car that says sugarloaf/usa. None of this SUGARLOAF shit.
You own multiple pairs of Carhartts – all of which you have either painted in or chopped wood in.
You know how to chop wood.
Somehow (I still do not know how) everyone you meet outside of Maine notices how you say the word “room” differently. And they think it is hilarious.
Club Oasis was the biggest club you had ever seen until you left Maine.
You think you say things with a Maine accent, but in fact you do not even have an accent remotely close.
You drive a Subaru. Or your best friend does.
The majority of your family lives in Maine, has moved back to Maine, or will never leave Maine.
In high school you were constantly thinking of ways to get up to Canada so that you could legally drink.
You hate whoopie pies. And you just found out a few years ago that the whoopie pie is the official state “treat”. Or you just found out reading that last sentence.
You like red hot dogs.
You know what Bert & I Maine humor is.
You completely understand the link below. And you think it is absolutely hilarious.
(Let’s be real, some of these might not exactly fit for some people, these mostly pertain to my friends and those I grew up with…but…if you are from Southern Maine, you can’t disagree with at least a few….it’s all for the humor friends!)